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Spider-Man’s uncle once said, “With great power comes great responsibility,” but what the great philosopher really meant was, “With great power comes a never-ending string of dumbass questions.” In the year since selflessly bestowing The Bro Code upon humanity I have been inundated with letters, emails, texts—even a few stalker-level break-ins—from people in every corner of the globe, but mostly France.
Everyone wants to know three things:
Why haven’t you been nominated for a Nobel Prize?
How can one person be so handsome, smart, popular, and handsome? (The “one person” I’m referring to is you—Barney Stinson.)
The Bro Code is immensely entertaining, educational, and available via Fireside Books/Simon & Schuster, but it offers only general guidelines about how to live my life. What do I do when I’m at the office, going to the beach, or when I’m supposed to be at the office but I’m at the beach? HELP!
I answer:
I couldn’t possibly nominate myself for The Bro Code—they’ve repeatedly told me it’s against the rules—but you can.1 Nominations for the Nobel Prize in Literature are due January 31 and should be addressed to:
Nobel Committee for Literature2. I don’t know, but if you’re a hot chick, perhaps we could discuss it at your place sometime . . . though now that I think about it, I probably can’t stay very long because I’ve got a thing later that night—but, yeah, no, let’s “talk.”
Relax. Daddy’s home. The next time you’re out and about and a Bro-related concern arises, just reach down your pants and whip out this handy reference guide: Bro on the Go.
For years I’ve wanted to supplement the universal laws of the Bro Code with a portable handbook of advice and commentary but for various reasons had to scuttle each previous effort: The Guy-dance Counselor,1Touching Your Inner Bro,2 and most recently The Pocket Stinson.3 Now, with Bro on the Go, I’m finally able to present the observations, reflective wisdom, and inspirational nuggets I’ve mined through the daily grind of being awesome.
In these pages you will find official Bro Codes in bold print alongside my own unique and powerful insights. To maximize utility, I’ve organized this volume by location so that a Bro trying to choose between black or gray spandex shorts for his workout can quickly flip to “A Bro at the Gym” and know the answer is a resounding “neither.” Used this way, it is my hope that The Bro Code will calibrate your moral compass while Bro on the Go provides a map to navigate your path toward total awesomeness and maybe, just maybe, getting laid big-time.
With these tools in hand (heh), you are now armed to live the life of a Bro on the Go. So take this package of wisdom, roll it into a generous cylinder, stuff it in your front pocket, and go, Bro, go.
1 You being a member of the Swedish Academy or another academy, institution, or society similar to it in construction and purpose; a professor of literature or linguistics at a university or college; or a previous Nobel Prize Laureate in Literature.
1 Sold title rights to adult film industry
2 Sold title rights to adult film industry
3 Sold title rights and life story to adult film industry—in negotiations to star in the movie or at least “pitch in” on casting decisions
© 2008 Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation
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Book Description Paperback. Condition: Very Good. No Jacket. Former library book; May have limited writing in cover pages. Pages are unmarked. ~ ThriftBooks: Read More, Spend Less 1.01. Seller Inventory # G1847399312I4N10
Book Description Paperback. Condition: Very Good. THE BRO CODE provides men with all the rules they need to know in order to become a "bro" and behave properly among other bros. THE BRO CODE has never been published before. Few know of its existence, and the code, until now, has been verbally communicated between those in the 'bro'. Containing approximately 150 "unspoken" rules, this code of conduct ranges from the simple (bros before hos) to the complex (the hot-to-crazy ratio, complete with bar graphs and charts). With helpful sidebros THE BRO CODE will help any ordinary guy become the best bro he can be. Let ultimate bro and co-author Barney Stinson and his book, THE BRO CODE share their wisdom, lest you be caught making eye contact in a devil's three-way (two dudes, duh.) Sample Articles from THE BRO CODE: Article 1: Regardless of veracity, a Bro never admits familiarity with a Broadway show or musical. Article 53: A Bro will, whenever possible, provide his Bro with prophylactic protection.Article 57: A Bro may not speculate on the expected Bro / chick ratio of a party or venue without first disclosing the present-time observed ratio. The book has been read, but is in excellent condition. Pages are intact and not marred by notes or highlighting. The spine remains undamaged. Seller Inventory # GOR002297540
Book Description Condition: Acceptable. Most items will be dispatched the same or the next working day. Seller Inventory # wbb0020085597
Book Description Condition: Very Good. 1712751997. 4/10/2024 12:26:37 PM. Seller Inventory # U9781847399311
Book Description Paperback. Condition: Used; Good. Dispatched, from the UK, within 48 hours of ordering. This book is in good condition but will show signs of previous ownership. Please expect some creasing to the spine and/or minor damage to the cover. Grubby book may have mild dirt or some staining, mostly on the edges of pages. Seller Inventory # CHL9099338
Book Description Paperback. Condition: Used; Very Good. Dispatched, from the UK, within 48 hours of ordering. Though second-hand, the book is still in very good shape. Minimal signs of usage may include very minor creasing on the cover or on the spine. Seller Inventory # CHL1367578
Book Description Condition: good. Befriedigend/Good: Durchschnittlich erhaltenes Buch bzw. Schutzumschlag mit Gebrauchsspuren, aber vollständigen Seiten. / Describes the average WORN book or dust jacket that has all the pages present. Seller Inventory # M01847399312-G
Book Description Softcover. Condition: Bon. Traces d'usure sur la couverture. Salissures sur la tranche. Ammareal reverse jusqu'à 15% du prix net de cet article à des organisations caritatives. ENGLISH DESCRIPTION Book Condition: Used, Good. Signs of wear on the cover. Stains on the edge. Ammareal gives back up to 15% of this item's net price to charity organizations. Seller Inventory # E-720-466
Book Description Condition: Good. Ships from the UK. Former library book; may include library markings. Used book that is in clean, average condition without any missing pages. Seller Inventory # 39586975-20
Book Description Condition: Very Good. Ships from the UK. Former library book; may include library markings. Used book that is in excellent condition. May show signs of wear or have minor defects. Seller Inventory # 14215246-6