Together Forever: Gay and Lesbian Couples Share Their Secrets for Lasting Happiness - Softcover

Marcus, Eric

3.5

8 ratings by Goodreads

9780385488761: Together Forever: Gay and Lesbian Couples Share Their Secrets for Lasting Happiness

Softcover

ISBN 10: 0385488769 ISBN 13: 9780385488761

Publisher: Anchor, 1999

View all copies of this ISBN edition:

Traveling across the United States, Eric Marcus met and interviewed forty gay and lesbian couples who have achieved the dream of a happy, lasting relationship. In Together Forever, Marcus writes about their lives and the secrets to long-term happiness these couples have learned over the nine to fifty years they've been together.

From Together Forever:

On Meeting:  "I said to myself, 'That's it. ' I don't know what 'it' was, but there was just something that was apparent to me right then--it was just a very deep sense of recognition that something was there that you had looked for all of your life. And it was there when you least expected it. "--Anyda, eighty-six

On Difference:  "The icing on the cake was after we had sex, after this very lovely experience with Curt, he said, 'Do you want milk and cookies?' And I thought, He's like a big girl, you know? And we're sharing vanilla wafers and milk in bed. And I finally got it at that point. That leather coat, the jeans, everything, it was just a fashion statement. "--Brian, thirty-five

On Monogamy:  "I really believed in nonmonogamy as an ideal...I still think if we worked really hard on making nonmonogamy work, we could probably do it, but I can probably learn Chinese, too. Look, I'm a vegetarian, but I still have a leather couch. No one's perfect."--Lindsy, fifty-two

On What Makes a Happy Relationship:  "I feel that it's the same secret between a gay couple or a lesbian couple as a heterosexual couple. It's sharing. It's giving a little, taking a little. Because if everything is going to be only about me, me, me, it's not going to be a good relationship. "--Stewart, forty-four

Most people long for a lasting love relationship. The couples in Together Forever have found it. Their experiences offer lessons to us all.

"synopsis" may belong to another edition of this title.

Review:

Just because gay men and lesbians are denied the right to get married under the law does not mean that there have not been gay "marriages": committed, sustained, emotional and physical relationships. In Together Forever, journalist Eric Marcus interviews 40 gay and lesbian couples who have maintained decades-long relationships and presents us with a complex tapestry of love, desire, and friendship that is as stirring as it is heartwarming, as invigorating as it is moving. While Together Forever contains much of what you might expect--coming-out stories, meeting-cute stories, tales of horrific homophobic cruelty, and just-folks-at-home images--Marcus is an astute enough writer and interviewer that the individual tales are always surprising. He is also not a single-minded booster for idealized, perfect relationships. Many of the couples here talk about their hard times with one another as well as their struggles with work and family. A compelling theme running through the book is how sexuality shapes and informs long term relationships. Questions of fidelity, open relationships, and monogamy surface in these interviews, discussed with honesty and a rare understanding and compassion. Written with a incisive eye for detail and an ear for the quirky phase and insight, Together Forever is a welcomed addition to the ever-increasing wealth of materials on the complexity and courage of gay and lesbian relationships. --Michael Bronski

From the Back Cover:

"A complex tapestry of love, desire, and friendship that is as stirring as it is heartwarming, as invigorating as it is moving--written with an incisive eye for detail and an ear for the quirky phrase and insight. "
--Michael Bronski, Amazon. com

"About this title" may belong to another edition of this title.